We all

fall

 

out of cars when we’re three –

when the excitement to climb down ourselves

puts our center of gravity in front of our skill level,

our little forehead in front of our feet,

 

out of windows in Moscow

for talking trash about Putin –

and that’s why we don’t live in Moscow,

 

off a bicycle at least once –

it’s a rite of passage impossible to avoid.

 

We fall from grace no matter how hard we try,

from pedestals too high – elevated by another’s need.

We fall into the wrong crowd when our parents aren’t looking.

We fall out of favor, out of fashion,

or all over ourselves to prove a point.

 

We fall in love

and out again;

we fall apart

and start again.

 

We might fall clipping a sandal toe on the edge of a sidewalk buckled from the heat

or by slipping on black ice lying in wait under a dusting of snow,

or we could lose our balance stubbing a tree root along the path –

 

a full-frontal faceplant.

 

Lots of bleeding, but

by grace, the very same we fell from,

nothing breaks –

not a tooth, not a nose, not a lens in our brand-new designer glasses,

nothing

 

except our confidence.

 

Blood pouring from our nose into our hands,

dripping off our chin where a flap of skin now dangles,

proceeds down the forearms in search of an elbow.

We’re exercising every blood-stopping skill

learned over years of practice –

as a kid, with our children,

for an aging parent unexpectedly fainting in the kitchen.

Finally, the last drop falls.

 

We look as if we’ve just torn open a small animal

with our bare hands

and feasted on its heart for breakfast.

 

Disbelief gathers up presence of mind –

we get up.

Sheer determination steps in to escort us

back to the car.

 

We don’t give a second thought to what’s happened

to our confidence

 

the confidence

left lying in blood-soaked dirt

no ceremony, not even a good-bye.

 

2.

Life is full of falling.

Snow falls,

leaves fall,

water falls over a cliff.

But unlike snowflakes,

or leaves in autumn,

or waterfalls diving into pools far below,

we’re propelled by an intrepid resolve

to get back up.

 

Falling off your bike at seven is a temporary setback

on the road to mastering balance on ever bigger bikes.

Falling face first at seventy is a turning point – a switchback

where independence takes on hiking poles

and Life Alerts dangling around our necks.

 

Ask the once free-flying, twirling snowflake how she feels

ending her journey face-first in what will likely become a nestled snowdrift

of snowflake friends

with the only confidence they have left

 

they’ll never twirl like that again.